Domestic
Violence
Intervention
Program

P.O. Box 3170
Iowa City, IA 52244
In Iowa: 1-800-373-1043
Phone: 319-351-1043
Fax: 319-466-4624
dvip@dvipiowa.org

DVIP relies on Paypal  for an easy and secure way to support victims of domestic violence.  Click the link below to make a donation...

Home

Domestic Violence and Youth (for caregivers)

Scroll down for links

Feelings and thoughts from kids growing up in violent homes

• “I felt really sad when my parents were always fighting.”
• “I feel like no one cares; they’re always fighting and forget me.”
• “Why does this have to be happening to me and my family.”
• “It would be less painful if I were dead.”
• “I feel like I’m more evil and violent.”
• “Maybe if I didn’t act this way, they wouldn’t fight.”
• “Is this what being married is like?”
• “I don’t think I can ever trust a man again.”
• “I felt so helpless and confused, I couldn’t help.”
• “I feel wary of guys my age, and a little older than me.”
• “I feel apprehensive about telling others how I feel.”
• “I was so angry at everyone and everything.”
• “I’ll get even, I’ll run away, then maybe they’ll pay attention to me.”
• “I don’t ever want mom to get remarried; he’d be a jerk just like dad.”
• “Maybe if I make threats, Mom will listen to me, it worked for Dad.”
• “I hate him; I have thought about killing him, then it would be okay.”
• “Now everything is ruined, and I don’t know how we’re going to make it.”
• “I can get my own way and what I want by being violent, it worked for Dad.”
• “I feel ashamed of my life, no one else lives this way. Do they?”
• “If my friends find out about my life, they won’t like me.”
• “Sometimes I get angry; I can’t control myself.”

Youth want you to know...

• We need you to try to support us and our feelings.
• Please try to be patient with us and understand how we’re feeling; we’re hurting too.
• We’re real, we aren’t invisible.
• Try to listen to us; we need to talk about our feelings.
• What happens to you affects us, it is our problem too.
• Please talk with us about violence.
• Sometimes we don’t want to have visitation with Dad.
• We don’t want you to stay for us if it means getting beat…
• If we talk to Dad, we still love you.
• We don’t want to take sides.

Women's Rural Advocacy Programs:
The Effects of Domestic Violence on Children

Family Violence Prevention Fund:
The Facts on Children and Domestic Violence

American Bar Association:
What is Teen Dating Violence?

Alabama Coalition Against Domestic Violence:
Dating Violence and Bill of Rights

Break the Cycle:
Empowering Youth to End Domestic Violence (click on "I might need help")

National Domestic Violence Hotline:
Teens, Young Adults and Dating Violence

National Women’s Health Information Center:
Date Rape Drugs

Domestic Violence Intervention Program
Serving Cedar, Iowa, Johnson and Washington Counties
Home

The IowaVINE system is a service through which victims of crime can use the telephone or internet to search for information regarding the custody status of their offender and to register to receive telephone and email notification when the offender’s custody status changes.  The toll-free number for IowaVINE is 888-7-IAVINE or 888-742-8463.  This service is provided to assist victims of crime who have a right to know about their offender’s custody status.