Abusive and Criminal Behavior

Domestic Violence is a pattern of behaviors that one person uses to gain control within an intimate relationship. While physical violence is the “enforcer” or criminal act, other behaviors erode the partner’s or victim’s sense of identity, self-worth and free will, and is ultimately lethal for many women. 

• Physical Violence ... hitting, slapping, kicking, pushing, choking

• Sexual Violence ... rape, unwanted touching, sexual humiliation

• Emotional/Verbal Abuse ... name calling, put-downs, public humiliation, yelling, degrading statements, mind games

• Intimidation and Threats ... using past violence or threats of violence to ensure obedience, displaying weapons to instill fear, destroying her property or abusing her pets

• Isolation ... cutting off from friends or family, resources that may help, controlling where she goes, who she sees and information available to her, using jealousy to justify actions

• Threatening Children and Loved Ones ... Instilling fear through threats to loved ones

This information is derived from the Duluth, Minnesota Domestic Violence Intervention Project which developed the Power and Control Wheel—the current model for practitioners in the United States.

The impact of domestic violence is devastating, affecting every aspect of victim’s lives and the lives of their children.  Being the victim of a violent crime, such as domestic violence, has dramatic consequences:

• Physical injury.

• Crisis and shock.

• Loss of trust and self-identity.

• Loss of a sense of control.

• Confusion and fear.

• Anger.

• Possible loss of loved ones, through injury or speaking out.

 A fundamental difference between domestic violence and other forms of violence is that domestic violence occurs within ongoing relationships that are expected to be protective, supportive and nurturing.  The victim wants to escape the violence and control, but also longs to maintain her family.  The victim’s loyalty and strong emotional ties to the abuser are powerful opponents to the victim’s desire to escape, and a powerful tool for a batterer to exploit/manipulate.  In addition, victims are faced with the overwhelming difficulty of relocation for safety reasons, perpetrator’s ongoing efforts to undermine independence and community resources, and the perpetrator’s continued access to their children.

Protecting Yourself

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